Confessions of a Stay at Home Mum

Sorry,┬áthis isn’t going to be as saucy as the title suggests.
There are no affairs or long lost lovers appearing out of thin air to tear my heart in two.

What I did have, was another baby.
A baby who is now just over eight months old.
And I’ve only just started to properly enjoy being her mama.
Don’t get me wrong, I love her. I loved her right from the start. But I had wondered to myself “What if I end up shaking one of them because I just want 5 minutes of fucking peace and quiet?”

No one talks about those days. Or in my case, those months.
They are hard.
You’re expected to just get it, because you’ve been there before. You know the drill. IT’s not like this is your first child.
But babies are very different.
Mine were. Dex slept through the night from 10 weeks. From 10- 6:30am and I had everyone telling me “Your next baby will be a terrible sleeper because this one is so good.”
And they were right. She was a terrible sleeper. She still isn’t that great.
But I don’t mind so much any more.
As DearBabyG put it when she said This is the way we choose to raise her, this is my daughter. This is the way she is. She won’t be little for very long, so I’m going to get all the midnight snuggles I can while she is still able to fit curled up between my legs and my chin.
I can’t believe I spent so much time worrying about how little she was sleeping. She’s happy most of the time. Loves her brother and her brother loves her. What more could I want?

I’m sick of people telling me to try this, try that. One person said to me “It’s because she’s breast fed she doesn’t sleep, give her a bottle.”
No.
She is my baby and I am feeding her.
And I will continue to feed her.

I am so lucky to have my two babies with me.
And I need to focus on that a little more.
Not only do I have a beautiful 8 month old baby girl who is learning new things every day but I also have a 28 month old little boy who is so amazing I just can’t put it into words.

He is so entertaining with his new words. His little personality is coming out and he loves his little sister.
I am proud to say that he is very polite and well mannered. He says please and thank you and excuse me if he wants to get past (most of the time).
I am always getting compliments on how well behaved he is.

I am lucky to be their mama.

2012 will be about celebrating that, as much as I can.

Lola – 6 months

Lola,

You are 6 months.

I can’t believe how quickly that has flown by.

Sometimes I worry that I don’t spend enough time with you, I don’t enjoy you enough. I’m sure every mother worries about that though.

You love your big brother. No one can make you giggle like he does. He adores you, too. He’s still a little on the rough side with you, but for the most part you don’t care.

You will have teeth any day now. They are so close and they are making you grumpy.

You can sit by yourself for a couple of seconds, but you prefer to be on your feet.

You are commando crawling, but you’re pretending you can’t whenever I’m watching you. But, I snuck to the door and watched you playing in your cot, so I know you can do it!

You are beautiful. Precious. Amazing.

All those things mother’s think about their children. But you are something else. Something special.

I can’t wait to find out what.

I love you.

xx